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Secret. 13303 by DeviantArtSecret Secret. 13303 by DeviantArtSecret
Send your secret to DeviantArtSecret@gmail.com

You are invited to anonymously contribute your secrets to DeviantArtSecret.

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Submitted by - DAS Helper 2
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:iconwaitwhatwhy123:
WaitWhatWhy123 Featured By Owner Jul 31, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
-cries-
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:iconmojoliazon:
MojoLiazon Featured By Owner Jul 24, 2013  Professional General Artist
I had someone reply to my post with the following quote, and think it might be helpful if I'll clarify it. Not intended to offend nor condemn anyone, but hopefully to show some humanity and truth to those who hold similar opinions to the quotes below.

"It's complete bullshit that things can take a "nightmare" turn and can cause you to be like this. At the end of the day, some brain conditions and/or trauma and some types of special needs can cause this aggression, but blaming it on past events and mental health is complete bull shit in my eyes."

These three statements are in direct conflict with one another. This belief system in practice leads to more harm than benefit. I once had a more or less identical theory on the topic.  

You accept that "brain conditions and/or trauma and some 'special needs' (what?) can cause this aggression" yet "blaming it on past events/mental health" is "bullshit" --- firstly, that's not what I did, and secondly, since past events can include the causes of some derangements, no, it's not bullshit, either. Regarding mental health as being not a cause of cruelty --- I believe it's accepted as the main cause worldwide, or one of the main causes. That does not mean all people who go through bad times become cruel, and it doesn't mean all people with mental health issues do either. 

My original post referred to some ways gentle and loving people can lose their way. This is scientifically known to occur. It's not uncommon. But the idea of accepting this translates to some people as apologist, or excusing, or as demanding forgiveness. It's not any of those. It's a small step towards comprehension of something most of us don't want to comprehend. When you've been hurt, being angry can seem like your only refuge, your only defense, a claim of the validity of the injustice perpetrated against you. These are exactly the misconceptions and contradictions that prevent some folks who've taken a bad turn from getting help. Condemnation can send them further downwards. Truly cruel people don't want to change. They don't believe it's wrong. 

It's scientifically, medically proven that events can happen to people that can cause them to become out of control or violent. This is old news. It can happen to anyone. Your heart's intent doesn't matter when your brain is unhinged. Most people will go through at least one period of temporary madness in their lifetimes and there is no guarantee of safety from it, unless you consider a permanent state of insanity safe.

If people can accept that real issues exist that can cause cruel behavior, then they are one step closer to having some sympathy for those who suffer from any of these disorders. Nobody says you must have sympathy. But please, recognize that some people who have done cruel things are not necessarily bad people. Cruelty is a broad term, too. The OP didn't even say they beat the animal, or anything. Cruelty can be as simple as being emotionally locked away, unavailable, to some creature human or otherwise that is in need. Kinda like what's going on with some posters who thought their response of condemnation would be helpful. 
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:iconmojoliazon:
MojoLiazon Featured By Owner Jul 22, 2013  Professional General Artist
Those standing in condemnation and judgment are showing some serious naivete. 

All it takes for a good, loving, kind person to become an abuser is a bit of brain damage. It can happen from injury, illness, poisoning from many common sources... And the person has become a cruel caricature of themselves that they never would have believed in their wildest dreams they could be. I know people who have become lost like this. It's tragic. Many cruel people did not start out like this, and they would have been the first people --- like those judging right now --- to condemn a cruel person. 

If you have no sympathy, then you have no comprehension of how easily we can become exactly what we hate. Judging is dangerous. I commend the poster for having the guts to front up, and I hope they do better in future. I would not shun them nor condemn them --- because that's cruel. 
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:iconiwannabetreo:
Iwannabetreo Featured By Owner May 23, 2013  Hobbyist Photographer
I understand. And it must have been very hard for both of you.
But I hope you don't get another pet until you learn how to control these things. Even if it was just yelling. If it was for no reason, then it just makes no sense to the dog and that's damaging for it, too.
Best of luck to ya, OP. Hope you get better. :)

:tighthug:
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:iconmysaddelight:
MySadDelight Featured By Owner May 20, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Yo. Keep your negative opinions to yourself. I understand your feelings, I've worked rehabilitating abused animals for about four years, but think about what you're doing. If the OP was to look at some of these comments, you know what she'd feel? Anger. And you know what she's trying to control? ANGER. She's done something horrible. She understands this and admits it. That takes some balls, even if you are staying anonymous. I know for a fact the previous owners of half dead kittens and starving dogs that we got at the shelter wouldn't have thought twice about their actions. Not to mention, not once does it say she actually abused her. It said she was cruel, which can mean a lot of things, especially when you're hurting. Think about when a loved one dies -- don't we all look back and think "Wow, I wish I hadn't said this..." or "Why didn't I take her to...?" and if you're anything like me, you've felt cruel and terrible for how you treated someone, even if you were trying your best, even if you weren't that cruel. Death is a nasty thing, because the dead can't tell you that you did right by them, or that they forgive you. So, for Pete's sake, leave the girl's confession in peace. You don't know what she's been through. End rant. Basically, just be nice people. This Secret thing isn't here for people to be scolded.
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:iconjepuisadore17:
Jepuisadore17 Featured By Owner Jun 1, 2013
YES! Thank you :)
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:iconmysaddelight:
MySadDelight Featured By Owner Jun 1, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
^-^ Mhm
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:iconjepuisadore17:
Jepuisadore17 Featured By Owner Jun 6, 2013
:)
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:iconkaulitzwolf:
KaulitzWolf Featured By Owner May 21, 2013   Writer
thank you for the comment, it's nice to see someone who has actually dealt with abused animals not just hopping on the blame train.:iconletmehugyoupika1plz::iconletmehugyoupika2plz:

As a friend of the ST says above the girl never harmed the dog, just yelled when she had her anger episodes, but she still blames herself for that. It was her neighbor that poisoned her dog, and other animals in the neighborhood as well.
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