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Submitted on
May 15, 2013
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Secret. 13278 by DeviantArtSecret Secret. 13278 by DeviantArtSecret
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Submitted by - DAS
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Oliveman40 Featured By Owner May 22, 2013
For the ST and everyone else going through this, here are what I think, from my experience, are the two main steps to overcoming this concern:

1) Go to the part of you that feels this way, and comfort it.
2) In the process of comforting, try to balance these two things: (1) accepting the world as it is - people can go down dark roads full of bad habits, and (2) your will to do something about it.

You CAN do something about it, too. Everything in the human world manifests from individual human spirits collectively creating our world. This means that by understanding how your life ends up in the way IT does and what you can do about it, you can help other people - you contribute a different energy in the end. So by transforming your own bad habits, you can gain the true knowledge that will allow you to help your friends transform their bad habits too.

How do you transform bad habits - go to the place inside you that commits the bad habit, and work with it - isolating every feeling that comes up along the way as something additional to the process. For instance, if you find yourself judging the part of you who commits the bad habit (like the inner overeater), isolate that perspective as the part of you who is judgmental. Just stay in the role of problem solver, who truly cares, and you will solve it. You can solve your bad habit, and the self-judgment at the same time! Just get to the bottom of it, and persist in your will to transform yourself while still caring a lot about yourself. Eventually the self who has the bad habit will find another way to live where they won't need that habit anymore. But it is never as simple as disliking the habit. Disliking an algebra problem never solved it, right? :) Same thing with inner issues.

If you want to know more about how to work through things on an internal level, check out my website at [link] - I've got some techniques, as well as my own insights. All free so no worries about that. Take care and good luck! : )
RavynRaver Featured By Owner May 22, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
I really hate to be the bearer of the bad news, but misery loves company. People who are miserable want to know they aren't the only ones, and will find a way to bring down those around them, whether they mean to or not. It's hard to lift yourself up when you are around that. If you EVER need, please send me a note. I am more than happy to talk about ANYTHING. Keep your eyes on your goal, and as much as it may hurt, you may have to let go of the people who hold you back. If you are that worthwhile to them, they will change so they can move forward with you.
andiechanz12789 Featured By Owner May 21, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
I ended up losing so many friends because they changed for the worse. I got bullied by them so much...I really couldnt handle the treatment I got from them. I have this friend who moved to Florida and I miss her so much. She's probably one of the only friends I got really.....
This just relates to what I am going through.....
BuickRegalRacecar56 Featured By Owner May 17, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
This one hits close to home- my closest friend changed so dramatically upon entering university, taking up drinking, partying, and so much more. She changed her attitude to match theirs so she'd fit in, and suddenly, she hated me for not growing up, even though I'm older than her. She literally threw five years of friendship down the drain for new 'friends' at university and completely changed who she was for people who'd rather drink than laugh about the latest stupid story idea. I understand exactly what you're talking about. I know what it feels like.
XxRockFiendxX Featured By Owner May 17, 2013
just be there for them if you can. you can't "fix" people, you can only be by their side if you choose to
randomflamingos Featured By Owner May 16, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I lost my bestest friend in the world a couple months ago. She meant the world to me. Until i lost her to her new snotty friend. I miss her, I can't help not think about it. I can't erase all my memories. So i feel like we're going through similar emotions and actually i feel a little better getting this out.
SantaFeDreams Featured By Owner May 16, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I had two friends once
But they went to the top and became popular
They cared for me at first but
They saw it was cool to be mean to me
Make me suffer
Pass fake stuff around about me
Tell everybody what I told them
Even stepped all over my report for school
My friends don't wanna be bullied so they left me behinde or just try to act like we aren't friends
.....I just am trying to make it through the year with out bothering why do you bother me
jdogthekiller44 Featured By Owner May 16, 2013
You cant stop it ever if you do their are going back to that road in the time
Fat-FAN Featured By Owner May 15, 2013
This. I have almost no family left because they all went the wrong ways. Now times that are meant to be big fun times with the whole family are... just a very small group.

If only... ? idk.
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