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Instigator117 Featured By Owner May 1, 2013
diva32kelly Featured By Owner May 3, 2013   General Artist
ThelordofallReturn Featured By Owner Apr 26, 2013
Confrontation sometimes work, my dear.
NorthernLights78 Featured By Owner Apr 22, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I read this and it smacked me right in the face just how true it is...
my best freind is gone to he wont come he gone and i miss him
MishiruTsuki Featured By Owner Apr 22, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Tell him how you feel about him changing you never know it can bring the old him back
imagreekgoddess Featured By Owner Apr 20, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
this happened to me too
ScribeOfTime Featured By Owner Apr 17, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
You should consider yourself lucky. It's easier to get over them once you realize that they're 'dead' or 'gone'. Not physically, but they've changed. It's worse when they haven't changed a bit, other than their feelings towards you, and you're stuck unable to get over them because they haven't changed completely and subconsciously you believe the part that liked you at one point hasn't changed either. But it has. It completely has. You just refuse to believe it.
edj3babygurl7 Featured By Owner Apr 17, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
i feel the same, i just wish my friend would care and i wonder if he misses me too...
animebecca666 Featured By Owner Apr 17, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I felt like I was reading my own secret... thank you for this.. Makes me feel not so alone
Destinyhope99 Featured By Owner Apr 17, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Exactly the feeling I got
RoseTheCow13 Featured By Owner Apr 17, 2013
this reminds me of this song [link] maybe watching helps
The-Lost-Hope Featured By Owner Apr 17, 2013  Student General Artist
I can't give awesome fix everything advice but talking to him might help.
Rallya Featured By Owner Apr 17, 2013  Student General Artist
If he used to be as kind and as caring as you say... Consider that there might be a reason for the sudden change and don't give up on him before you talk to him about it. (: Ask him what's wrong and point out to him what he's been doing differently. Maybe he knows; maybe it's a phase of sorts and he's doing it on purpose, to get your attention, to see if you might chase him. Maybe he doesn't know. In any case, seeing as how you've described him as a really good guy up until a certain point... Well, give him some credit. He might be acting silly now, but someone like that wouldn't become a different person overnight unless something big had happened.

I know. I've been in his shoes, so to speak. Something caused me to break away from a friend (I felt like I was the only one trying to keep our friendship alive, the only one working up a sweat over how things would turn out, the only one really caring and other such things; it got me really depressed for a while there as I struggled to figure things out and what my role was, exactly, in her life) and I just wanted a sign from her, you know? Something that would point me in the right direction. She knew me pretty well; when I started acting more indifferently towards her, I wanted her to come up to me and ask me why (trusting that she knew I'm not the sort of person who would do this kind of thing for anything short of a very serious reason). And I would have told her everything, would have apologized, even, for acting the way I did and I would have been her friend until the end of time; even if that meant not knowing where I stood for the rest of our lives; even if it meant that I'd always be there for her, but that she wouldn't be able to do the same. And she had even gone through something similar before; she hurt a very good friend and she just let them go. I guess I hoped I would be special, in the end, and if she had shown me that... Well, things might be different. Although I seem to have been replaced quite easily, in the end, even though for me it's one year later and I'm still sad. ((:

Anyway, my point is this: to other people and even to her, it might have seemed that I suddenly changed. That I was randomly acting like a jerk. But, see, it took me a long time to do what I did; I spent a long time considering the implications of my actions. And, most importantly, there was a reason. There were several. Things are never black and white and people rarely become someone else overnight.

My advice is this: sit him down and ask him all of your questions. Talk to him about your friendship and ask him if he's really willing to lose it. I mean, just be sure that you've tried your best to understand what's happening before you give up on him completely or you might regret it. Who knows? Maybe he just needs a little push.
harrietdam Featured By Owner Apr 17, 2013
Your story.... It's like you took the words right out of my mouth :(
I hope we'll find someone who doesn't find us replaceable, soon :)
It made me feel better reading about someone in a pretty similar situation, so.. thanks :)
Rallya Featured By Owner Apr 18, 2013  Student General Artist
Oh, sure. :D
Don't worry, though. I'd say that the fault doesn't lie with us, but rather that we've been looking in the wrong places. Or, at least, I knew it was the wrong place to look with my friend. I was just hoping against hope. (: I would have liked it if I had been more special to her because she meant a lot to me (still does), but this kind of thing can't be helped. And in any case, who's to say that the replacement is in any way better? :D
Anyway, take heart. :hug: Life is pretty long if you actually think about it in these terms. There's plenty of time to meet someone for whom you'll be completely irreplaceable.
harrietdam Featured By Owner Apr 18, 2013
Oh man.. Story of my life, again ;_;
Yes, life is long, indeed :) although it can be a bit hard seeing it in that way, sometimes.
Thank you for replying to me, though :) and I wish you luck in finding your special someone (for whom you'll also be special!)
Rallya Featured By Owner Apr 18, 2013  Student General Artist
You're welcome.(:
I've already found them, though, but thanks and I wish you the best of luck as well. :hug:
Cyluho Featured By Owner Apr 17, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
That's odd - currently I'm trying the same thing and all I do the whole time, is asking myself who of us is the mean one?
But, what I wanted to say - truely wise words ;)
Rallya Featured By Owner Apr 18, 2013  Student General Artist
Hm... I often think to myself that I should have just talked to her. (: I mean, how I chose to act wasn't the best. But, you know, after you've been thinking to yourself for a while that the "fate" of that friendship rests solely on your shoulders and that if you just stop trying things will end... Well, there's a limit to how much you're willing to do without encouragement. There comes a time when you just want to stop and see if the other person is willing to put in some effort for a change. Something small. A question, a talk, something to show to you that even if you're trying harder than they are... Well, that what you're doing is appreciated and that it would be missed if you stopped.

If you're asking what is mean, though... I'd have to say my way of acting was mean, for sure. There were so many better ways in which I could have dealt with this, but that wasn't the point, was it? I wanted to know what would happen and that was the only way to figure everything out. I mean, people say one thing, often do another... I just wanted some measure of proof. But it wasn't something I did on a whim, as I'm sure it's not that kind of thing for you, and I would have made it up to her had she let me. It was equally mean that she chose to give up on me so easily, knowing me the way she did.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that this is a situation in which everyone ends up being kinda mean. There's really no way around it. (:
The best you can do is make sure that your heart's in the right place. :hug:
Cyluho Featured By Owner Apr 18, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
THAT'S exactly what I thought! I feel like I've been running after him for - I don't know how long, but sometimes I just don't know. Seems like he isn't doing anything and I just don't want this anymore. "Oh, just keep on running after me, I like that - it makes me feel important." I KNOW that's not easy for him at home, but did he ever come to think that maybe I also want to feel important sometimes? I just don't know anymore. We'll see ;P

Wait, lemme see - yep, it's placed on the left, slightly middle... guess that's right :D
Setsuai-sama Featured By Owner Apr 17, 2013
I agree with this. Just sit down and have a chat with him. It could either make him realize he's acting this way, or you can better understand the reason for his coldness. Either way, you gain a little more understanding, and hopefully you can retain your friendship with him with minimal damage.
Dartmaul15 Featured By Owner Apr 17, 2013
I can confirm what he told.

I've seen both sides of it. Most of the time they haven't noticed themselves, and if they have noticed they often thinks it's too late.
In most of the cases they returns to who they were. Not nececarily overnight,but they change back.

Give it a try :)
grapeninja Featured By Owner Apr 17, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
I can relate, a close friend of mine just flipped and changed, forgetting that myself and his two other friends existed and cared for him. Everything happens for a reason though, maybe your friend became so distant to you because he knew you and your friend deserved better, you were just caring too much to notice that he was actually doing you a favor? Though yeah, you sometimes think, 'I wonder if he's ok?' and you miss them...but remember, you miss the old person, not the new one. And just carry on remembering that its not you who's changed, its them and its not you're fault that thry did, they changed because they just weren't happy with themselves.

Sometimes its for the good. I'm happy now, it gets better in time after loosing somebody. Trust me.
Reimann Featured By Owner Apr 16, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I understand this entirely, the very same thing happened with me and my Fiance, he ended up changing so much it was like a totally different person.. I feel like the man I loved had been replaced with someone else. . - .
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