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Secret. 12878 by DeviantArtSecret Secret. 12878 by DeviantArtSecret
The Secret Teller would also like to say: "I kinda need some help figuring this out. If anyone could help me that would be the best thing ever."

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halperin98 Featured By Owner May 8, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
I think you should tell your friends, not family... yet...
NekoNekoGirl997 Featured By Owner Apr 29, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
No one can say shit, now can they? Kid, you're you. Your friends and fiends and family don't control you, and they can suck it. If you look chicks or guys then go for it. But make sure you actually find someone that means everything to you before you make this choice- changing your mind usually doesn't end well, I've found. Luck to ya.
dakatmew Featured By Owner Apr 17, 2013  Student Writer
It's okay to be yourself, and perfectly fine to do whatever you want with your life. It's yours, not theirs, and they can't take yourself away from you.
theSTARthatSHINES Featured By Owner Apr 16, 2013  Student Writer
this is almost exactly how I feel. I'm pretty sure my dad is a homophobe, though I'm not sure about the rest of my family. Plus, I have a boyfriend.
x-Skylar-x Featured By Owner Apr 16, 2013
This is me exactly. Every way.
PurpleLuverForever Featured By Owner Apr 16, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I've always thought the terms Lesbian and Gay were offensive. Somebody can like only the opposite sex until they fall for someone of the same sex. Someone can like only the same sex until they fall for someone of the opposite sex.

Sexuality is not who we are and it does not define us. We are ourselves. We can love a man, or a woman, or hell, we can love both.

We are ourselves and that's all that should ever matter.
PurpleLuverForever Featured By Owner Apr 16, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Okay, that sounds like I'm saying we can love hell and that's honestly not what I meant. But if you want to love Hell... Well, whatever floats your boat, I guess.
hermafrodite Featured By Owner Apr 10, 2013  Hobbyist Photographer
SAYIN that your bisexuality is who you are indacates that bisexuality is your diffineing caRaCTERISTic my ADVIce is TO just iGNore IT AND FOUCUs ON THE oTHER pARTS of you
Erza-Dorothy Featured By Owner Apr 3, 2013  Hobbyist Artist
I agree with the previous comments; you don't have to label yourself as bisexual or lesbian or anything. What matters in the end anyway is who makes you happy. ^^
SelenaCat Featured By Owner Mar 31, 2013  Student Writer
Honey, if you absolutely have to, wait until you're able to take care of yourself before you "come out." If it protects you from a family that would wish you harm in any way because of who you think is attractive, then it's not worth it.

Be strong, stay safe, it gets better.
xXNibiNoNekoXx Featured By Owner Mar 31, 2013
I hate labels. What I prefer are preferences. Such as for myself I'd have a preference for masculinity, I like muscular and hairy guys. I have a female friend who I'd say has a preference for femininity, she likes really feminine guys and girls. I have another friend who I think would have a preference for personality, she is not attracted to looks, but the individual themselves. So rather than trying to pigeon hole yourself to a specific label, just be yourself and accept what you like wholeheartedly.
ThousandCookie Featured By Owner Mar 30, 2013   Digital Artist
A) You don't have to fit a label - a label fits you. Let yourself develop, take time and see what happens. Thought I might've been bisexual six years ago, still curious but it's never gone beyond that. I don't put a label on it. No label seems quite right for all your quirks, and you don't need to make a new one so you have something to call yourself. You're you.

B) Your sexuality isn't who you are, it's what you are. I wouldn't worry too much about telling them something like that unless you're in a relationship with another girl and want your family to know, but I'm imagining you're still young. You've got time.

C) When it comes to it, you never know. My friend got threatened with being kicked out when he came out to his family. They've grown to accept it (kind of), but regardless of that, they love him anyway.
Asrath Featured By Owner Mar 29, 2013  Student General Artist
:hug: I know your feelings. Recently I've discovered I'm transgender and bisexual, which is kinda a large pill to swallow all at once, lol. Or more like... a crazy rollercoaster ride about my identity... one moment it's clear as glass, another foggy as mist. And I'm so afraid people won't understand, or what if I'm wrong? What if I was 'just confused' and made a mistake...
I just don't know it anymore, honestly.

Anyway, I have nothing substantial to add to all these terrific comments, but I hope all will go well! Just remember; you're not alone! Just look at all these great and helpful comments and you'll understand. *hugs*
Coeb Featured By Owner Mar 29, 2013
Similar situation here. ^^; I've never been close to my parents. We can't talk without fighting. The mere sound of my voice annoys them, my presence makes their mood turn sour, and I can't look at their faces anymore. Worst part, I don't know why things fell apart - and I don't know when they started to, this is all I remember; or else I'd try to fix it. I'm pansexual, but on the verge of being lesbian. The one family member I talk to is my brother, who has pretty much the 'common' problems and never seems to have inner conflicts that arent about money or social status, and he is very, very much against same gender pairs. I'm such a romantic towards girls that I'll go under their window at night with a guitar and sing - though the ones I fall for are always straight - and I'm afraid for the day when my family finds out my preferences. The comfort to me is that they never bother with my life, and by this time I'm a pretty convincing liar.

Personality isn't a series of words, hun. We all try and search for who we are when we are the one searching in the first place. I tried to describe myself, and I ended up with 'happy, cheerful, upbeat, pessmistic, optimistic to others, likes dancing, really lazy, loves sleeping in, likes mornings-' and I couldn't simply find anything not contradictory. Personality is how you think, what you wonder when you look at a person - what you see when you look at a crowd. It's what colours pop out most from within the surroundings, what style you like wearing best, and your favourite sound. You are you, and though we'll never be able to explain who we are, it's because we are the only ones who know ourselves, so we can never even begin to describe. We say we search for who we are when we are the ones searching, like the leash on a dog. Don't stress yourself. When you turn around, you'll find the leash there eventually.
BlazeandIcy Featured By Owner Apr 16, 2013
Is it possible to favorite comments????
ufez Featured By Owner Apr 15, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
not to be a creepin' on your comment but that was the most beautiful thing I've read.
IIIVAxelVIII Featured By Owner Mar 29, 2013  Hobbyist Photographer
i can completely relate to this. just recently discovering who i was in being bisexual, and now i have to hide it from my homophobic family. it saddens me that i have to do this but on the other hand i know my parents would never accept who i am. so now i have to hide who i am, but i know that hiding it is best. i do have a cousin who is completely accepting and can confide in him. perhaps you have an alternative family member you can confide in besides your parents
CosmicDusty Featured By Owner Mar 29, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I feel the exact same way right now...
DianaVVolf Featured By Owner Mar 29, 2013  Hobbyist Photographer
i know your feelings... i had a time when i was realy really confused about that who i am? one of my friends told me that she is bi and then our friendship started to turn into something more...but I didn't feel like this before against a girl...i had a very hard period till my soul and my heart decided what they want... finally they decided that I love that girl and now we're in love :) fortunatelly my mom isn't homophobic and she loves my darlin but i can understand your feelings inside...

i love you from here and I give you the energy ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

if you have someone to talk to, just search me here :meow:

best wishes!:heart:
arcanehalo Featured By Owner Mar 29, 2013  Student General Artist
I'm pretty touchy (like physically) and close to my female friends too, I'm also very masculine for a girl, and I like guys who are feminine (I am and always have been single by the way).
I have many bi and lesbian friends too, but I've never felt that I am bi.

But my parents also are quite different in my regards to the gay community. They dont care as long as it's not in their family, but if anyone in my family came out I'd welcome them with open arms.

When they found out I liked yaoi (and they only knew that to be the RELATIONSHIP stuff, none of the sexuality of it) they already kinda freaked, but it's a topic that's been swept under the rug and forgotten if not brought up. Don't even get me started on when my mom found this love letter some random girl in school gave me (anonymously)<all girls catholic school. She went into this spiral of discussing it with me and it hurt to hear her so against it even if I wasn't interested.

I haven't told them I know about porn, I'm their perfect daughter. They don't know I read it, watch it, sometimes write it, they don't even know I cuss. I can relate to that anxiety in you, and I also know being or at least suspecting your bisexuality is a different level.

Because of this, I suggest you really do some introspection. Picture your future. Can you really imagine yourself with a woman in a serious relationship? If you can then maybe you are bi, or you're open to it. I couldn't. I couldn't imagine it without finding it incomplete for me. But if you can feel complete like that then maybe you are bi.

And if you're like me and your family is close, maybe you can talk to someone--only one--whom you really trust about your ideals regarding the topic. What bisexuality is and if it's bad, bring it up like a political topic not a serious one.
If you find you're sure to be bi, and you realize they really won't like it then build some trust circles outside your family. You will need it. I've found that my acceptance of friends has helped them very much when their families don't. Perhaps it will help you too. Then when you feel a bit secure even outside the family, and have the courage, talk to them about it. Discuss the matter, and then gently inform them.

THat's just my advice. I hope it helps.
KA-KeitorinArtist Featured By Owner Mar 29, 2013  Student Digital Artist
YOU ARE THE BRIGHTEST STAR IN THE GALAXY! Come ON! MAN UP! or Woman up... Which ever one you are ^.^;

You have the power to change the futur just like we all do! Be that person who can fly and break down walls, build up new ones. Change foundations, and screw traditions. If tradition says no to who you want to be, IT IS TIME TO BREAK IT DOWN WITH SHEAR FORCE! YOU HAVE THE POWER TO BE YOU! :D

P.S. I'll root for ya ;)
Kaplarkablast Featured By Owner Mar 29, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
I know how you feel. It's kinda confusing understand that you sexual orientation it's different from the one you've always thinked to have, I dunno if I'm explaining good.
But that's not a bad thing, absolutely. It's the sign that you're growing up and starting to create your person. Everybody passed this point in the life.
This is a period of great transformations, and it's naturally that you're a little confused.
First, you should take a moment to reflect on yourself and think about your sexuality. Before of being accepted from the other you need to be accepted by yourself.
Then, if you'll accept your bi orientation you can start to talk it with the others. Having some bi/lesbian friends helps! You can share your feelings and your doubts with'em and they surely understand and help you.
For the question of the family... This is kinda difficult point. I'm bisexual since 4 months; my friends know about it, but I just don't know how to say it to my parents.
We can talk about it together, I'll be pleased to help you someway. In case you need, contact me. :)
dhxjcrd Featured By Owner Mar 29, 2013
That's the thing when you're a teen. You're trying to discover who you are. That's exactly what this fase is about, even though now people seem to think it's just stupid and pointless.
DJ-Megalodon Featured By Owner Mar 29, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I feel exactly the same sometimes, I still haven't told very many people... Including my parents. I feel it's more my family that wouldn't accept me. My family believes you shouldn't be insecure of your sexuality, but they feel acting on it is evil, and you'll go to hell or something. I don't believe that yet... I'm still afraid.
The4getfulfish Featured By Owner Mar 28, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I came out my freshman year as being bisexual..
I thought It would be the hardest, worst and most tragic thing to do in my whole entire life;
but it wasn't.
Now, my family isn't homophobic, but I was still scared sh*tless, none-the-less.
It's kind of a big deal - but so is the fact that even at the age of eight I had crushes on not only boys, but girls too.
I felt so... awkward. I broke up with my boyfriend at the time and experimented into my newfound sexuality...

and as i talked to my parents, it turns out that my own mother is bisexual- that's right; my mother. bisexual.
now, our circumstances aren't quite the same, but what i was raised to believe is that nothing can stop you from being who you are. you can't help being your unique self. :)

We all wish to know who we are in this world. and the first step is to just do what's natural to you.
kinda like looking for a hobby - don't take on something that just frustrates and bores you to no end.
Do what YOU feels right, my fellow friend. :)

It took me a long time... about five years, actually.
See- I was 15 when I came out, and now I'll be 20 this summer.

Anyways - i've finally realized that I Love my family and friends unconditionally; that i like i find both sexes attractive and that my straight friends don't care; that I'm an absolute anime freak; that i love to draw and play my flute; but most importantly is that I'm happy with who i am, and If anyone has a problem - then i'm sorry they're missing out.
because my sexuality does not change the happy-go-lucky, livin' life to its fullest, person i am everyday! :heart:

~I hope somehow that this has helped you, even in the slightest, and that because you're learning about what makes you tick, it doesn't stop you from "Livin' like Larry." lol~

P.S. - if you ever need to talk, I can be pretty much all ears, and you know where to find me! :happybounce:
thegoodsamaritan Featured By Owner Mar 28, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
I am (sadly) a closeted bisexual in a mostly Mormon household, and those who aren't Mormon are very conservative. And I can tell you right now that keeping all of that inside is going to destroy you. You have to tell someone. Someone you can trust, who you know can understand you. They can help you figure this out. I was afraid, too, but I promise that there is nothing to be afraid about.

Keeping it inside is only going to make it hurt worse. If you want, you can message me, and I can try to help you out a little more. I'm sorry if I'm not very clear here. Just know you're not alone.
hippiegirl500 Featured By Owner Mar 28, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
i can relate message me if u want!
SyrinaKorramaya Featured By Owner Mar 28, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Honey, I am completely with you there! Right now I'm split between my straight male crush, and my bisexual best friend (whom I am considering asking out).
lmoonga Featured By Owner Mar 28, 2013  Student
I'm pretty much right there with you. I'm almost sure i'm straight, but at the same time I'm just not sure at all. I've pretty much decided to keep it between me myself and my best friend until I'm certain of anything. Good Luck!
Eearii Featured By Owner Mar 28, 2013
I'm going to go against the crowd here: Depending on your current place in life, I wouldn't recommend coming out to your family. If they're that homophobic, and you're in a place where you still require their support in some way, particularly if you live with them, then you do risk being forced out.
Yes, I do agree you should come out if you feel that way, but be careful.
LuckyHetaliaFangirl Featured By Owner Mar 28, 2013
Oh, this is a hard one! I know I'm bi, mostly because I fell in love with a girl, but I still like guys. I know it's hard, but wait it out! See if you manage to fall in love with a girl! If not, then... I honestly don't know. I'm sorry. :1
catzrcute Featured By Owner Mar 28, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Hey, das okay, bro. I'm here for talks. And if you are bi, it is what it is and you shouldn't let your homophobic family shame you for bein' who you are. Also, I'm sure your friends will accept you.
CoyoteDove Featured By Owner Mar 28, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Being cuddly with girls doesn't make you bi. Feeling physically attracted to males and females makes you bi. Though if you are bi then you should tell them, they deserve to know, but lay it on slowly
Vladimir-Valentine Featured By Owner Mar 28, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
Just because you're cuddly with your female friends doesn't make you bi -_-
GemriQueen Featured By Owner Mar 28, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Tell them and if they cant exepted that well thats not there chose its your if your bi be pround of it.
AskCeilingItaly Featured By Owner Mar 28, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
It's alright to feel like that. People will accept you if you accept yourself.
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