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Submitted by - DAS
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:iconghibli92:
ghibli92 Featured By Owner Mar 21, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
I've always been very, very open about myself and who I am online(displaying my name, pics of myself, telling stories about my life). However, looking at what one commentator said, we all have different 'personas' when it comes to real life, internet, or otherwise. We all adapt our personality to whatever situation we face; tweak it to whatever is apporpriate at the time- but we're still the same person, all the same.
I can see where it would be nice to have a different life online. However, if it hurts people, or if you get too emotionally attached to an internet friend, I think that confessing to said friend is very, very important. I'm not sure how they will take it, but I hope that they will love and accept you as they have before! I've had some very heavy stuff going on IRL in the past 6 months, and I'm so thankful I have friends that I know will accept me, no matter what. I'm hoping it's the same for you!
Reply
:iconemoturtlefrk:
emoturtlefrk Featured By Owner Feb 13, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
ugh :/ i've been there too....i can't say it'll end well... but i hope something good happens for you :/
Reply
:iconpandalove49:
pandalove49 Featured By Owner Jan 28, 2013
well maybe you shouldnt have lead someone on in the first place
Reply
:iconaprilfear:
aprilfear Featured By Owner Feb 25, 2013  Student Writer
Just shut the fuck up already and stop. If you don't like these secrets, DON'T READ THEM, DUMBASS!
Reply
:iconcrystal-baka:
Crystal-Baka Featured By Owner Jan 18, 2013
I'm there. It sucks. I want to get out of it but they are my friends and I just don't want to say "Hey! I'm leaving and never coming back :D" It really isn't that simple if you have people you love and don't want to leave behind. :/
Reply
:iconbroken-and-whole:
broken-and-whole Featured By Owner Dec 21, 2012
close the account, get out of the situation NOW! And if you need to talk to someone!
Reply
:iconsam-ryan-king18:
Sam-Ryan-King18 Featured By Owner Dec 12, 2012
I think, alot of people know this situation *sigh*
Reply
:iconjtcheney:
jtcheney Featured By Owner Dec 11, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Then close the accounts. I know it may seem like it's not that simple, but really it is. You are already admitting to yourself that it's a problem and has gotten out of hand. Move on. Un-plug. Be yourself and love yourself.
Reply
:iconhikari-dareigan:
Hikari-Dareigan Featured By Owner Dec 10, 2012  Student Traditional Artist
I knew someone who did this....But to the extent where she pretended to be an entirely different person that she wasn't, not just a character. Tricked everyone she knew for at least six years. She finally admitted it a while back and said she felt guilty about it. I told her I forgave her, but...I still can't believe she kept it up for that long. I feel bad about not contacting her anymore, and I'm sure she feels terribly guilty for it, but hell, I can't help feeling betrayed.

If there's one thing I can say for her, it's that I'm glad she was finally honest with me. She could have just dropped off the face of the earth and made me worry. I advise you don't go down that path. You have got to be honest with the people around you, but more importantly, you've got to be honest with yourself and not keep up this act.
Reply
:iconmartiowlsten:
martiowlsten Featured By Owner Dec 10, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Been there - I totally understand.
Reply
:iconzantmarx:
ZantMarx Featured By Owner Dec 10, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
I did this a few years ago. I think the best way is to just make your fake persona spend less and less time online. Either that or start to make your persona closer and closer to your own personality until you become the same person
Reply
:iconbahar1:
Bahar1 Featured By Owner Dec 10, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
That sounds like really good advice. It must be hard to achieve, though. I guess you become pretty attached to the persona after a while...Well, I think the best way is as you described it! :)
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:iconcrazy--chicken:
Crazy--Chicken Featured By Owner Dec 6, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
I've had my masquerade as well, and up until about a month ago, it was fine. Then she asked to see me. I showed her a picture. She was happy- I was happy. But that picture wasn't me. Then she asked me to show her a picture through my webcam on a join.me. I had been conning her for about a year then, and I spilled the beans. Every single one of them. Everything went to shit, but in the end, it worked out and we were still 'friends'. Don't be afraid to confess.
Reply
:iconsnezhinka:
Snezhinka Featured By Owner Dec 5, 2012
the worst thing is when you don't let youself get close to others for fear of the truth coming out...I cn relate to that...
Reply
:iconbekku:
Bekku Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2012
My husband and a good six or so of our good online friends were a victim of this. A girl kept posing as a different woman, engaged in relationships with them all until they were talking marriage and meeting.. Then just up and disappears.. not giving them any closure.. I think confessing is best.
Reply
:iconisinbi:
IsinBI Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
I think all RPers have been through this situation. I think in the end, however, it really is you. The personality part at least. As long as you're not letting your persona date other people, it's fine by my book. Once you start dating people things will go bad really fast, because your gf/bf will get emotional attached to your persona and when (and if) they find out the truth, a lot of hurt and drama will occur. And you'll most likely lose them as a friend as well.
Sometimes lying about your age or even sex (When you're a female RPer, lots of creeps who want to cyber will find you) isn't a bad thing. Sometimes it's just protection. And if you need some escape gate to be the person you want to be, making a persona can be helpful too. I think it the end the truth will come out, anyway, and if everyone was just your friend, they'll still like you and not mind much. If they knew you well and you were very close, I'm sure they even suspected it at some point or another.
I know after I quit with my persona, being able to detect when someone was fake/living through a character got pretty obvious and began second nature. I never got mad at the new friends I made when they admitted the person they said they were wasn't actually them. But, that was probably more because I been in that position myself. (Geez, did I ramble. OTL)
Reply
:iconred-stained-december:
red-stained-december Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
We can all relate.
Reply
:iconscribeoftime:
ScribeOfTime Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
I can relate to this.
Reply
:iconverriterriberri:
verriterriberri Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2012
How has it gotten out of hand? So long as it's not affecting your life off the internet, you're ok
Reply
:iconsnezhinka:
Snezhinka Featured By Owner Dec 5, 2012
I think that's what ST means by it getting out of hand - when it leaks out of the cybersphere and starts interfering with real life...
Reply
:iconfaith-25:
Faith-25 Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2012  Hobbyist
It happened to me and I was only 13... At that point I just deleted everything.
It made me feel relieved. I think fake personas can become dangerous...
Reply
:icondemitrivencia:
DemitriVencia Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Yes, I have/had the same thing. A kind of. My fantasy person is a male... and I'm a female in real. So many girls liked me... >< I liked it some way... but I just have to remember that I'm not that fantasy person, I'm just a girl in real... o.o but it would be awesome if I could be my char just for fun XD Just for one day... or that he was real... but yes... I stoped with rpg... I just write a story about my fantasy, that's a lot better I guess x3
Reply
:iconask-twisted-red:
Ask-twisted-red Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2012  Student General Artist
Say it to me! I am an active Role Player!! :O Sometimes it gets somewhat out of the hand, but it's kinda funny how the things turn out later!! XD The world of false personas is not really fake, because in some point, the character you play starts gaining its own personality ^^; And that's when things go out of hand, not when you identify with it...))

Now, there's nothing bad on getting offended when someone treats your character badly, because it is kinda, AND I MEAN KINDA... Like a son :O_o:))
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:iconsktaf:
SKTAF Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2012  Student Digital Artist
I don't know why anyone would do this... I can understand perhaps hiding behind a different name/age/etc to protect yourself. However, if you're prone to drama why do it to yourself?

I am me through and through and i don't stumble into drama. I'm pretty sure if i posed as someone else i wouldn't stumble into drama either. Consider your persona as the work place. Leave work at work and take yourself home. Keep internet drama out of real life and don't let it get you down UNLESS you've managed to wrap your real life friends into the belief of this persona as a different person... then you should just tell the truth.

I had an old ex-friend whom I had stopped speaking to due to differences. She created a fake account and started posing in as a different person through comments, favs etc. After a few weeks, things were all too familiar. Eventually she admitted that she lied to me and it was a fake account. What did i do? I continued not talking to her and blocked her out completely. I didn't want her drama to begin with- through her real identity or fake one.

Internet is the internet. Most people have a hard enough time getting through life as it is in their own town, why the hell would you openly go out into a 'world of billions' to bring more drama in from around the world. People are assholes. that's all there is to it. Don't go to the internet thinking otherwise unless proven otherwise.

You can't change the internet, you can't change the people on it. The only person you control is yourself and your own ability to stop doing things that hurt yourself.
Reply
:iconengelsblau:
Engelsblau Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2012
Em, that's sad I suppose?
Reply
:iconatsumaawari:
AtsumaAwari Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
CATFISH.
Reply
:iconbahar1:
Bahar1 Featured By Owner Dec 10, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Hahah, I watched that. Yeah.
Reply
:iconatsumaawari:
AtsumaAwari Featured By Owner Dec 10, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
thats what i thought of ><
Reply
:iconltr91:
LTR91 Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2012  Student Interface Designer
funny thing is it was a persona for an anthro hand.
Reply
:iconuberredkitteh:
UberREDKitteh Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2012  Student General Artist
First world fucking problem...
Reply
:iconmonochromegoggles:
MonochromeGoggles Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2012
Hahaha, I've never really had an issue like this. I see online personas as sort of experiments to test people's reactions to certain personality stereotypes and whatnot, it can be helpful if you're a writer looking for inspiration and new ideas to make each person within a story unique. To put yourself in the shoes of your character and play the role as them can be an interesting experience if done with the proper mindset and you remember that it's just a game, and not reality.

I suppose I can see how this can be a problem for some. One of my biggest peeves with this issue is when people begin to think their character or made up persona really is them, and they start to get offended when others don't like this fictional self they've created. Others are just too insecure to show their true selves to others, and feel they have to put up a front or fabricate a more interesting life for themselves in order to get attention or acceptance.
Reply
:iconurilii:
Urilii Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
ahh.. I know how that feels. ^^
Reply
:icon333hf333:
333hf333 Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
First of all - calm down.

Once you've looked at your problem with a detached mind, it will be clear.
Reply
:iconbunnyb133:
bunnyb133 Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2012  Student General Artist
I see this kind of thing kinda pathetic. Really, if everyone were just themselves online, there would be less trafficking and other problems caused by it.
Also, how are you supposed to get any trust when you're fake? You get more supporters when you're the real you, too. Why even bother doing it?

now, drawing yourself is different. It may be hard to draw every outfit you wear, so giving yourself an online outfit makes it easier.

no offence to anyone, that's just how I think
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:icontamani13:
Tamani13 Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Most people use persona even in every day life. We all have different faces for different situations and for different people. Sometimes online it's nice to just play a role. It's not as though this person is lying about who they are to stalk someone or anything. Sometimes when people aren't fully happy with themselves, this is a place they can be who they want. I can understand your point of view but I'd just like to point out that a persona is a part of you too, and not all as uncommon in real life as you may think. Very few people are ever truly themselves at all times.
Reply
:iconghibli92:
ghibli92 Featured By Owner Mar 21, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
:thumbsup:
Reply
:iconbunnyb133:
bunnyb133 Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2012  Student General Artist
oh.. mkay...
Reply
:iconbaconmagic:
BaconMagic Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2012
:iconfirstworldproblemplz:
Reply
:iconmcsini:
mcSini Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2012
Just be yourself. If people don't like it, they can suck a dick, haha
It's beneficial to both you and everyone else; if you can respect YOU-- it will help you respect THEM.
Stepping out of old habits can be hard. It's a process.. You can express yourself, and not your persona. The only catch is, you have to be willing.
Reply
:icondarkkairi:
darkkairi Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2012  Student General Artist
huh. I have my mmorpg characters that may have different names, but they all have aspects my personality in the end. I guess this kind of thing becomes a problem when you create a character too far removed from your original personality and people make friends with that character. I can understand why people would be scared that their friends would leave them.
Reply
:icondamn-it-sammit:
Damn-It-Sammit Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2012  Professional Digital Artist
That's why you don't do it in the first place. : P
Reply
:iconrabinastre:
rabinastre Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2012
Having been there and done that (though I was fourteen at the time), having experienced the fallout, the best thing to do is sit down the people you care about most and tell them the truth. Probably they will be really upset (mine were) but at that point most of them suspected I wasn't being truthful anyway. Most were like "Wow, thanks for actually admitting it". I did lose one or two friends but the rest stuck around to figure out who I really was under the persona. They'd liked who I'd pretended I was, so odds are they will like who you actually are.
Reply
:iconthevampireninja:
THEvampireninja Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2012  Professional Writer
I had this problem. It wasn't until someone else admitted to faking who they were, to the point of making me worry about them, that I rethought the idea. It's fun to pretend as long as, in the end, no one gets hurt. Depending on what happened I don't think it's a good idea to let the person 'slip away' but rather, to ease people into the idea of it being fake.

At least, when I admitted that something wasn't true about me, it didn't change much because it didn't change how people knew me...
Reply
:iconerikroger:
ErikRoger Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2012
I bet the accounts that post stolen googled images of porny naked girls are actually dudes. Possibly not all guys, but I'd say 90% or more are, especially if the interests seem over the top lesbiany and the faves are all of bent over women. I don't know which is sadder, the guys pretending to do that or the guys who actually think it's a girl they are sending explicit comments to.
Reply
:icontsengen:
Tsengen Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2012
I as well. Haha living a double life can be rough.
Reply
:iconartbyclarabellafaire:
artbyclarabellafaire Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2012  Professional General Artist
Be yourselves, guys. It's A LOT easier.
Reply
:iconalbaharu:
Albaharu Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2012  Student Digital Artist
i think this is the first deviant secret who alows comments :o
Reply
:iconapplesourzz:
AppleSourzz Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Not the first, no. But there's very few of them that do allow comments.
Reply
:iconangelalala923:
Angelalala923 Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2012  Student Interface Designer
Ugh, it's so discouraging to see how many people are admitting to doing this. You guys need to get a hobby, or a job, or something...
Reply
:icongreetingsfromhell:
GreetingsFromHell Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2012  Student General Artist
Why not do both?
Reply
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