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Understand "I see you don't understand the situation."
I don't understand. I can't understand. The pain you feel for such a person. I just can't. Even I don't understand why. Even though I don't know the whole situation, yet, I can't understand why.
"She's the first person I've opened up my heart to in such a long time."
She betrayed you. Threw you away like trash. You said this yourself and you still are loyal to her. Loyal to such a person. I try to understand but your logic isn't within my reach. It's frustrating but I try to understand.
I want to type the words out and send it to you, to comfort you and your broken soul. Even if it's to comfort you, to make it seem like there is someone out there in your reach, to understand you I can't lie in such a situation.
Teenage TaoismGiving birth is the closest I’d ever felt to dying.
Before that, my near death experiences had consisted only of my silent announcement of pregnancy—silent, being that my social media accounts were all deleted almost simultaneously and I never returned to school in the fall, saying without really saying that I had caught the malicious disease of “teenage pregnancy”. I’m sure the whisper spread in the hallways like the Bubonic Plague. That September, sitting at home on what would have been the first day of my senior year, I imagined friends I’d never talk to again saying “she was only seventeen, and so full of life!” at my absence in the cafeteria tables, as if they were attending my funeral instead of talking about me behind my back.
"Full of life," I had snorted then, folding a never ending stream of what had once been my own baby clothes. "Literally."
I walked around like a zombie for the months of my pregnancy, deciding t
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