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Secret. 11611 by DeviantArtSecret Secret. 11611 by DeviantArtSecret
This is a follow up secret to: [link]

The secret teller would also like to say: My boyfriend is drifting away from me slowly. He hates me. I'm selfish. I regret it a lot. Whenever people change, they either change for the worse, or think they've changed into something better. My stomach is so empty now. I'm so sorry, my baby...

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:icondaaggeagneta:
DaAggeAgneta Featured By Owner Sep 28, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
I will pray for you.
Reply
:iconpear001:
Pear001 Featured By Owner May 2, 2012  Student General Artist
Oh honey. It was of no fault of yours that this dreadful accident happened. Miscarriages are almost never through the fault of the mother and please dont blame yourself for something you had no control over. I know that your boyfriend is drifting away but he shouldnt blame you either. You are not a selfish person because you didnt make the choice and remember both you and he will always be changing and it will eventually become a change for the better. Again please do not blame yourself and please know that your baby Jacob, wherever he is, is loving you just as much as he would if he were with you.
always remember it was not your fault and he loves you.
Reply
:iconthemysticalmediator:
themysticalmediator Featured By Owner Apr 16, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
How is this your fault?! At least you cared. You don't see people getting abortions walking around guilty, so why should you? (I'm not against abortions, I'm for them if one's heart feels the situation is right.) Anyway, I'm sure your baby loves you unconditionally regardless, and doesn't want to see his mother slumped over crying over him. Wherever he is, I'm sure he's happy and safe anyway.
Reply
:icondalek1965:
Dalek1965 Featured By Owner Apr 18, 2012
Actually, yeah you do see women who feel guilty about getting an abortion. The peole who don't feel guilty... are monsters.
Reply
:iconthemysticalmediator:
themysticalmediator Featured By Owner Apr 19, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Not necessarily. There are cases with rape, and having a child is a big step. There are just some times when sending a baby to heaven is better than the circumstances it would go through on Earth with someone who doesn't want it and can't take care of it or would abuse it. It would be hell for the baby, which is unfair and unnescessary. If someone with those traits got an abortion (only once or twice), it wouldn't be that bad of an idea. And if someone was raped, after being forced on, (your baby likely reminding you of the criminal) I don't blame those who get an abortion, even who don't feel guilty, because it's not their choice, and it's their body. In the long run, I don't believe people should intentionally go without decent protection and have continuous abortions. Abortion is not meant to be done frequently, in my opinion. If you put the baby there voluntarily, it isn't fair to the babies to disappear when you got yourself pregnant repeatedly, never learning from going without protection before. So many people want children, and people like that throw them away. Abortion is a very controversial issue, but no matter what opinion you have, most people support their opinion in favor of the baby, and that's what matters. Sometimes it's just not something to feel guilty about, and sometimes you should.
Reply
:iconpersondev:
PersonDev Featured By Owner Apr 15, 2012
It was an accident. Stop blaming yourself. It's not healthy for you or those that care about you.
Reply
:iconflabaflaba123:
flabaflaba123 Featured By Owner Apr 15, 2012   General Artist
Unless you MADE yourself have a miscarriage, it's not your fault..
Reply
:iconantarticaeyes:
AntarticaEyes Featured By Owner Apr 15, 2012  Student Digital Artist
this must be an awful burden to carry...i really cant imagine your grief...but know this...some bad things happen only to make things better...this might be hard now...but who knows...maybe things will get alot better ^^...remember you are a very strong woman..be proud
Reply
:iconlarkwing:
Larkwing Featured By Owner Apr 13, 2012   General Artist
Oh god. Dear, it isn't your fault. These things are never your fault. You can't blame yourself for it... Not at all. My heart goes out to you-- I hope there's more light in your future. You need it.
Reply
:iconkaorimaru:
kaorimaru Featured By Owner Apr 13, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
what happened to him was not your fault. these things happen and its unfortunate.
Reply
:iconvalkyrie-knight:
valkyrie-knight Featured By Owner Apr 13, 2012
this is heart breaking :hug: look don't be so hard on yourself. Sometimes the best thing doesn't feel like the right thing. You'll get through this, and i hope your boyfriend can come to his senses and be there for you because obviously you need that. Maybe you should confront him about that if you haven't already
Reply
:iconquill-of-wonder:
Quill-of-Wonder Featured By Owner Apr 12, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
You didn't cause the miscarriage unless you did drugs or something. Don't feel guilty for something you couldn't control. I'm so sorry you feel this way, yet I doubt you did anything major to cause it.
Reply
:iconellenmellenn:
ellenmellenn Featured By Owner Apr 12, 2012
It's horrible, but sometimes these things happen. If you influenced it, I'm so sorry you have to deal with that, but though it's hard you can forgive yourself for it. If you didn't influence it, then it was never your fault in the least. My mother had a miscarriage before me, and one of my friends with two children now also had one. Neither of them are to blame for their miscarriages, and neither are you for yours. Reach out to the people who love you; if they see you hurting like this and really love you they'll do their best to help you :heart:
Reply
:iconthehatterschild:
thehatterschild Featured By Owner Apr 12, 2012  Student General Artist
It isn't, everyone will say it, but believe me it isn't.
:heart:
Your son loves you.
Reply
:icondemonmaster21:
demonmaster21 Featured By Owner Apr 12, 2012  Student Photographer
Deep...Nuff said
Reply
:iconevermore-willow:
Evermore-Willow Featured By Owner Apr 12, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Never ever say its your fault. Talk to your bf about this, express to him how you are feeling. If he doesn't understand, help him understand. But you need a supportive group of people to be around during this time. Don't let this destroy your life, yes its a travesty and yes its a horrible thing to have happened to you. But it is not your fault. I'm sure, wherever Jacob is, he knows his mommy loves him. Be strong, let your body and spirit heal. Everything will be ok, I know this because my grandmother had 5 miscarriages before she as able to have my mother. My grandfather, her husband, stayed with you and helped her every time.
I hope and pray everything will turn out ok.
Reply
:iconmegantoy:
megantoy Featured By Owner Apr 12, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
What DemonMaster21 said; "awesome advice"
Reply
:iconevermore-willow:
Evermore-Willow Featured By Owner Apr 12, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
:3
Reply
:icondemonmaster21:
demonmaster21 Featured By Owner Apr 12, 2012  Student Photographer
Awesome advice
Reply
:iconevermore-willow:
Evermore-Willow Featured By Owner Apr 12, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
thank you :heart:
Reply
:iconceeyochanelfenlied:
CeeyoChanElfenLied Featured By Owner Apr 12, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
This wasn't your fault ST, miscarriages can't be helped. He will live on in your heart and memory. <3
Reply
:iconhawk-moth:
Hawk-Moth Featured By Owner Apr 11, 2012  Student Writer
If you had a miscarriage that wasn't caused by heavy drinking or anything you could have stopped, it isn't your fault. A miscarriage is the body's way of aborting because there might have been something terribly wrong with the fetus. My heart goes out to you, and if you intend to try again, the best of luck to you.
Reply
:iconlauralf:
LauraLF Featured By Owner Apr 12, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
I agree with everything you said
Reply
:iconkatryder:
katryder Featured By Owner Apr 11, 2012  Student Photographer
Since you didn't really say how it happens...

If it was an accident, I'm very sorry.

If it was something you purposefully did, let it be a lesson to yourself, and find solace in the fact that people make mistakes. You are mortal. You are allowed to make mistakes. The fact that you hurt so much now proves that you have more than atoned for what you have done.
Reply
:iconbritishbrunette:
BritishBrunette Featured By Owner Apr 12, 2012  Hobbyist Filmographer
This ^
Reply
:iconshinyzombie:
shinyzombie Featured By Owner Apr 11, 2012
:iconfblikeplz:
Reply
:iconrs-kyra:
RS-Kyra Featured By Owner Apr 11, 2012  Student Photographer
A miscarriage is NOT your fault. He wasn't born yet, so you didn't kill him. You will have another chance to bring a life into this world but for the love of everything, PLEASE understand that a miscarriage is an accident, completely out of your control.
Reply
:iconfandomaniac:
Fandomaniac Featured By Owner Apr 11, 2012
ST, it's not your fault you had a miscarriage. I personally don't want to have children, so I can't imagine how hard this must be for you, but you can't blame yourself for something that's completely out of your control.
Reply
:iconacryliced:
acryliced Featured By Owner Apr 11, 2012
it is absolutely not your fault you had a miscarriage.
Reply
:iconv2113:
V2113 Featured By Owner Apr 11, 2012  Student General Artist
DON'T BLAME YOURSELF. You had a miscarriage. That's not your fault! Blame nature, blame God, blame genetics. It's NOT YOUR FAULT.
Reply
:iconv2113:
V2113 Featured By Owner Apr 11, 2012  Student General Artist
I'd like to add - I have a cousin who got pregnant, after having sex before marriage. She had a beautiful baby girl... who died of SIDS a few weeks later. Was that her fault? NO. So... don't you dare blame yourself.
Reply
:iconyumireiku:
yumireiku Featured By Owner Apr 11, 2012
As horrible as this sounds, because I've had a miscarriage too... We don't know WHY she had a miscarriage. If it was by pure nature, then no. It's definitely not her fault. But if she did something reckless like smoke, drink or get too physically rough with anything on purpose...It would be her fault.
Reply
:iconanarwolf:
AnarWolf Featured By Owner Apr 18, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Its not her fault either way even if she did something reckless. Nature is nature. I was 2 months pregnant with my daughter and didn't know it. I drank and smoked those first few months of her life and she turned out fine. My sister did nothing during her pregnancy and lost my nephew six months in. It not YOUR fault ST things happen. I hope the best for you in the future. <3
Reply
:iconyumireiku:
yumireiku Featured By Owner Apr 18, 2012
If she does something reckless, it is her fault.
There are people who will smoke and drink all the way through and have a healthy baby. It doesn't mean it's not reckless it just means you got lucky.

There are people who are pregnant till the 7th month, who would be considered the best pregnant woman ever and still miscarry. That is nature, and that wouldn't be her fault. But if she went smoking and drinking and frolicking around like a college party girl, I feel no pity. That would be her fault.
Reply
:icontwistedgrimfaerytale:
someone lost a child and they are grieving for that baby. Have some sympathy, no matter what they did, mothers shouldn't have to bury their children, no matter what.
Reply
:iconyumireiku:
yumireiku Featured By Owner Apr 29, 2012
I'm just going to keep copying and pasting my other answer.

If she does something reckless, it is her fault.
There are people who will smoke and drink all the way through and have a healthy baby. It doesn't mean it's not reckless it just means you got lucky.

There are people who are pregnant till the 7th month, who would be considered the best pregnant woman ever and still miscarry. That is nature, and that wouldn't be her fault. But if she went smoking and drinking and frolicking around like a college party girl, I feel no pity. That would be her fault.
Reply
:iconv2113:
V2113 Featured By Owner Apr 11, 2012  Student General Artist
...true. Sadly. But... true.
Reply
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